If you read my last blog post, I mentioned the limitations of our spoken language and how it impairs our ability to have meaningful success or lasting happiness.
Happiness and love both work as a kind of paradox, independently of one another.
The more love you take, the less you will receive and the more happiness you search for the less you will find.
Even when you have discovered how to who you are and manifested your character into existence…some days it’s still not enough.
Self-love and fulfillment are both precursors to confidence.
Therefore, if you’re looking for someone else to give you the pieces you’re missing, you will always be overly-dependent on others to give you what you need. This will create an unrealistic expectation of others to give you something it’s unreasonable to ask them for.
Try these 3 things if your tank is on empty.
Call Your 3 Best Friends
We’ll start with the easiest one. This is a simple one that works like a charm. Pull out your phone, call up your 3 best friends separately, and tell them each what qualities you love about them most and how much of an impact they have had on your life. Avoid saying anything about your day or answering any direct questions they might ask by saying, “I feel grateful to have you in my life. Thank you for being such an amazing friend.” Then, politely tell them you have to go and move onto the next one.
Give Away Your Most Priceless Possession
Time. It’s the one gift that can never be repaid. There’s so much communication we miss or ignore during our day because we get so focused on the next task or hopeful outcome that we filter others out. We listen for the important details and the highlights of what they’re saying so we can respond if we need to and look polite and attentive in the process. The next time you’re thinking about your rough day and how to feel better, stop for the next person that speaks to you. Listen for emotion instead of content. You’ll be surprised when they either solve your problem, answer your question, or change your outlook. Not to mention that you’ll make a new friend in the process and they’ll appreciate the time you spent with them. One person can’t change the whole world…but you can change the world for one person.
Leverage Your Talents
You’re not having a rough day, week, or month. You just forgot how talented you are and haven’t been using your gifts properly. Sit down, focus, and for 1 minute write out a list of three talents you’re known for.
If you can’t think of any you’re being dramatic…but if you can’t get past that, call up a family member, a loved one, or your parents. Tell them, “I’m just calling to tell you how much I love you and that I’m grateful to have you in my life. You’ve given me so many opportunities and really played a huge part in the amazing man/woman I am today. Out of all the amazing gifts you’ve given to me, what would you I’m most talented at?” When they do, ask “Is there anything else?” Be silent and listen. When they reply, tell them you have to go and thank them again for being such amazing parents.
If that doesn’t work enough by itself, then use one of your unique talents to bring happiness into someone else’s life. If you’re intelligent, be intentional about helping someone else solve a problem. If you’re empathetic, be with someone that needs your compassion. If you’re responsible, show someone how to organize their life so they can enjoy it. You’ll help them achieve the impossible.
Without your help, life wouldn’t never have manifested so perfectly.
This is the essence of your purpose.
Spread the love that you appreciate from others so much. Try that out a few times and watch an aura of confidence wash over you and discover the endless abundance of love and happiness that was in you all along…you just forgot how to access it.
“Life isn’t characterized as meaningless if you don’t have a purpose…it is characterized by unbearable suffering.”
-Jordan Peterson, MD
We live in a time where people confuse happiness and pleasure. Searching externally for what you can receive from someone else is a recipe for becoming a validation addict. Moments of pleasure sprinkled throughout a life of suffering. Happiness is within the self, internal. Find it, and you will have an addiction to life showered in gratitude. There’s no person, place, or thing that will be able to provide you with what you crave. There’s no shortcut.
Know yourself and you will know peace.
Now go out there and unleash your gift on the rest of the universe.